This morning I woke up and felt that I needed to have a talk with God. A personal conversation that was needed a while ago. I walked past my mirror and came across a sticky note on their reading Matthew 11:28-30. After reading it, I knew at that very moment I needed to cast some burdens on the man upstairs. I always talk about my growth, healing and rest. I just felt like this time was different and I needed to remove all burdens in my life. Easier said than done, but it is a process. Within my prayer I asked God to give me a sign that everything I’m experiencing will be alright, remove who and what isn’t for me, and allow me to love on myself more.
Not too long after my conversation with God, I had a conversation with my best friend about a few situations that have been bothering me. Although it wasn’t what I wanted to hear, I needed to hear it. He told me to stop stressing over situations that are out of my control. First sign, God was using my best friend as a vessel to remind me to let go and let God. Stop allowing situations to alter my mood and get reactions out of me.
Shortly after my conversation with my best friend, I began to play music. Music allows me to focus while I’m working throughout the day. Here comes my second sign. Shuffle is playing, then I hear W.A.Y.S by Jhene Aiko. As much as I love this song and overly play it, I decided to really pay attention to the lyrics. Why did I not know that W.A.Y.S stood for “Why Aren’t You Smiling?”
Crazy, right? I knew immediately God was asking why wasn’t I smiling and allowing tears to flow from my eyes. The lyrics really touched me today and I just started crying as I began to read the following lyrics.
“It’s that everything takes time. You have gotta lose your pride. You have gotta lose your mind, just to find your peace of mind. You have gotta trust the signs, everything will turn out fine. So why aren’t you smiling?”
Knowing that everything will be okay, why wasn’t I smiling? Honestly, it’s not a bad thing that I cried, there was something I needed to let go of. I than realized that I needed to lose myself in order to find myself again. In my heart I always know that everything will work out in my favor. At times I tend to backtrack on my thoughts and actions. I definitely have every reason to be smiling these days.
I lost myself, but began taking the necessary steps in discovering who I actually am.
themakingsofshe.com 